So, What's A Praise Kink Anyways? We Answer All The Questions You've Been Dying To Ask

With the Internet slowly but surely becoming a more sex-positive place, it's not surprising that more open conversations are being held about sex. In fact, it's a great development because these conversations help destigmatize sex and the complicated emotions that come with it. One of these emotions might be the tummy-fluttering feeling of being told by your partner that you're doing a good job.

Of course, most people might like that validation, but it's one thing to appreciate the compliments and another to actually be aroused by them. The latter is what can be called a praise kink; a kink that can be applied to either partner regardless of sexual position. Sex expert Angie Rowntree told PopSugar that this specific type of praise isn't just something you can just mindlessly say while in the act. Rather, it has to be intentional and pointed in order to be effective.

"It involves the intentional use of praise and kind words in the context of sex or foreplay — and it's not just what is said, but how it is said and the context," she explained. "Praise kink is a kink when it is used as the focus of the interaction between partners, or is part of a power exchange dynamic."

How to know if you have a praise kink

As one might expect, it isn't difficult to determine whether or not you like being praised during sex. However, just because you like being praised doesn't necessarily mean you have a praise kink. Being told you're doing a good job or that a certain part of your body is hot in your daily life is one thing, but it's another thing altogether to be told that in a sexual context.

If you want to know if you have a praise kink, talk about it with your partner. While not as intense as most kinks, praise is still ultimately a kink and should be discussed in detail before being put into practice. If you find that your partner praising you elevates the sexual experience or even makes you finish, then you likely have a praise kink.

The same goes for if you are the more dominant figure in the relationship. Whether your partner wants to be praised more or you want to praise them, discuss your boundaries and preferred terms. For example, one person might like being called a good slut, but another might consider that offensive. Take note of potential praise trigger words and don't be afraid to experiment within each other's bounds.

Why some people are really into being praised

As previously stated, it's reasonable that a certain percentage of people want to be validated for what they do on a daily basis. Praise in a sexual context could be part of that naturally-human need. Since the act of sex is sacred and special, receiving praise during sex can make a compliment feel heightened in intensity. As such, praise kinks can be utilized in all kinds of relationships, ranging from new and vanilla to seasoned BDSM relationships.

"Typically, people enjoy praise in the bedroom for the ego boost and/or power play involved in one person evaluating the other," sex educator Suzannah Weiss told Elite Daily.

However, there are also some people who react to it not based on psychology, but on biology. Being praised can oftentimes induce dopamine, a chemical that creates a feeling of joy or happiness when your brain is engaged in stimulation. This genuine rush can also be aided by other chemicals like serotonin and adrenaline, according to sex toy company Xinghaoya, and is important to understanding whether or not you're into any kink.

Ultimately, that is what is important when it comes to exploring praise kinks and all other kinks in general. If you find that you aren't into it, don't feel ashamed or lesser for it. We all react to different sexual acts differently, so tell your partner if praising or being praised isn't working out. However, if it is, then you'll find your sex heating up in ways you couldn't previously imagine!