30 Quotes From 'The Goonies' You Should Recite Regularly

Mikey, Chunk, mouth, and Data holding a map and pointing at an abandoned restaurant in 'The Goonies'
The Goonies via Warner Bros.

"Goonies never say die!"

These Quotes From The Goonies Will Have You Feeling Completely Nostalgic

God, how I love The Goonies.

I don't entirely remember where I was when I first watched it, I just know it was on TV one night and I'm so glad I stayed up past my bedtime to view it. Ever since that moment, it has become my favorite film.

Anytime anyone asks what my favorite movie is, before they can even finish that question, I quickly proclaim this '80s adventure as the one I cherish more deeply than any. Well, not including Pearl Harbor, but only because it's the movie that introduced me to my biggest celebrity crush to date, Josh Hartnett. But that, my Goonies, is a story for a different day.

Might I redirect your attention to what we all came here to discuss, The Goonies? This flick has it all—action, adventure, kids proving they can change the world, and Cyndi Lauper. The only thing that could make it better is a sequel. Though it has been the topic of discussion for years now, nothing has happened. All I'm saying is that I will personally fund, star, direct, and edit The Goonies 2 if that's what it takes to make this happen.

Until then, reading through these iconic and hilarious quotes from the '80s blockbuster will have to hold me over. And if any of you execs at Warner Bros. are reading this, I'm serious about my offer.

The Goonies via Warner Bros.

The Goonies Quotes

  • "Yeah, but you know what? This one, this one right here. This was my dream, my wish. And it didn't come true. So I'm taking it back. I'm taking them all back." -Mouth

  • "The only thing we serve here is tongue! You boys like tongue?" -Mama Fratelli

  • "If God made it that way, you'd all be pissing in your faces!" -Brand

  • "That's all right. You and Brand are home safe with your mom and me, that makes us the richest people in Astoria." -Mr. Walsh

  • "I'm beginning to like this kid, Ma!" -Jake

  • "We had our hands on the future, but we blew it to save our own lives.... Sorry." -Mikey

The Goonies via Warner Bros.

Quotes From The Goonies

  • "Andy, you Goonie!" -Troy

  • "Brand, God put that rock their for a reason...and I don't think you should move it." -Stef

  • "Those are my friends, the Goonies." -Mikey

  • "Your voice is kind of nice when your mouth isn't screwing it up." -Stef

  • "Mikey, come here and make me feel like a woman." -Mouth

  • "That's what I said, booby traps." -Data

The Goonies via Warner Bros.

Memorable Quotes From The Goonies

  • "'m not all alone in the dark. I like the dark. I love the dark. But I hate nature. I hate it!" -Chunk

  • "That's okay daddy. You can't hug a photograph." -Data

  • "You are my greatest invention." -Mr. Wang

  • "Martin Sheen? That's President Kennedy, you idiot!" -Stef

  • "Dad! Dad! It's my marble bag. The Fratelis forgot to check it. I emptied out all of my marbles and put the jewels in. We don't have to leave the boon docks!" -Mikey

  • "Braces? I don't wear braces, Mikey wears bra... Mikey! That little..." -Brand

The Goonies via Warner Bros.

The Goonies Famous Quotes

  • "Goonies never say die!" -Mikey

  • "Hey, you guuuys!" -Sloth

  • "First, you gotta do the truffle shuffle." -Mouth

  • "Don't you realize? The next time you see the sky, it'll be over another town. The next time you take a test, it'll be in some other school. Our parents, they want the best of stuff for us. But right now, they got to do what's right for them. Because it's their time. Their time! Up there! Down here, it's our time. It's our time down here. That's all over the second we ride up Troy's bucket." -Mikey

  • "Hey I've got a great idea you guys! Slick shoes!" -Data

  • "Hi Willie. Oh, I'm Mike Walsh. You've been expecting me, haven't you? Well I made it. I beat you. I got here in one piece... so far." -Mikey

The Goonies via Warner Bros.

The Goonies Funny Quotes

  • "Everything. Okay! I'll talk! In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog… when my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out… but the worst thing I ever done – I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa – and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life." -Chunk

  • "I'm gonna hit you so hard when you wake up your clothes are gonna be out of style!" -Brand

  • "The marijuana goes in the top drawer. The cocaine and speed go in the second drawer. And the heroin goes in the bottom drawer. Always separate the drugs." -Mouth

  • "Heh, if you hit the wrong note, we'll all 'B flat!'" -Mikey

  • "Bye, Willy. Thanks." -Mikey

  • "No, actually she's out at the market buying Pampers for all us kids." -Brand

The Goonies via Warner Bros.

We Want to Hear From You

Which quote from The Goonies has you hoping for a sequel?

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