Dating Deal-Breakers: How To Talk About Marriage / Kids With Your S.O.
Does your relationship have an expiration date?
How many kids you want, what you think of marriage, where you want to settle down — these topics aren’t exactly first-date conversations. But if you’re in a serious relationship and want it to stay healthy, you need to open the lines of communication and have blunt discussions with your partner about your relationship's potential for a future.
The first topic you and your honey need to discuss is your thoughts and expectations on marriage. Studies show that people are getting married later and later in life. Many are eschewing the institution of marriage altogether. If one partner wants you to put a ring on it by 30 and to have a fairytale wedding while the other doesn't even believe in marriage, the odds of the relationship lasting are slim.
The second topic you and your partner should discuss before you get too serious is having children. Some people want 1 or 2 kids maximum, while others want 7 little rugrats running around. Many people are choosing to be childless, others physically cannot have children, and others still are opting for more unconventional options like adoption, IVF, or surrogacy. If both partners have drastically different visions for their family life, the relationship is going to have an expiration date.
Talking about your ideal relationship goals and managing expectations is crucial to deciding whether or not your relationship has a true future. There are no right or wrong opinions on these significant topics. Marriage and children are life-changing milestones, and everyone is entitled to live and shape their lives as they see fit. All that matters is that couples are brutally honest with each other about their desires and with themselves about what they are willing to compromise.
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