How To Say No To The Guy Under The Mistletoe

Here are some ways you can say no to that Christmas kiss.

Let me set the scene. You are by the appetizer table where the mistletoe is hanging. You are overloading your plate with cheese, some veggies, and hummus because you are #hangry and a little bit too drunk. All the sudden, Ted is there. He looks up at the mistletoe and then at you. Uh oh, you know exactly what Ted is thinking. He begins to lean in for the kiss. Time is moving in slow motion. Here is what you do:

  • Palm his face and continue to glob hummus on your plate. He'll get the hint.

  • Say, "no thanks Pal"

  • "Nice try, Mister"

  • Laugh it off

  • Scream at the top of your lungs and flip the table over

  • Start to cry at Ted and begin talking about your ex boyfriend who broke your heart

  • Wave at your girlfriends to come over and have them save you

  • Become invisible, because women have essentially been invisible in society since the beginning of time

  • Tell Ted you have brie breath from all the cheese you've been consuming, but maybe next time

  • Direct Ted towards your sluttier friend, Rachel

  • How about just saying no to Ted, because saying no is enough when you don't want to do something?


Important to remember when it comes to consent-- no means no. You don't need to justify or make an excuse for not wanting to do something. You don't need to feel obligated to kiss someone because of an age old tradition of a branch hanging from the ceiling. So when it comes to the holidays, whether it's sitting on Santa's lap or kissing under the mistletoe, remember-- consent still matters, and always does.

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