'Marriage Does Not Start When You Walk Down The Aisle': Viola Davis' Vital Relationship Advice

For more than two decades, Viola Davis and husband Julius Tennon have built one of Hollywood's longest yet private marriages. Despite her lengthy relationship and outgoing job in the past, the Oscar winner has often described herself as an introvert, once joking to E! News that she's "maybe a step away from being a straight-up loner," while Tennon has called himself "the mayor of everywhere" because of his outgoing nature.

Though their differences could have created challenges, the couple, who married in 2003, have instead learned how to embrace what makes each other unique. As such, Davis has not shied away from sharing vital relationship advice to other potential longterm couples. "Marriage does not start when you walk down the aisle," Davis explained to E! News. 

"Your marriage starts when you look over at a person who you love more than anything, and there's something about him — just one character trait that makes you say to yourself, 'Oh man, that's going to drive me crazy. I don't know if I can deal with this.'" In her quote to the outlet, Davis added, "And then the next minute you say, 'But you know what? I love him.' That's when your marriage starts." In other words, it's understanding that there's no such thing as a perfect person, but as long as you're compatible and putting in the effort, it can work.

Over the years, Davis has opened up on a few occasions to share refreshingly honest relationship advice, often pushing back against the fairytale version of marriage that many people expect. Prior to her marriage to Tennon, she took a realistic approach to romance, making it her goal to find a lasting love rather than someone to complete her. This meant she had to be clear about the qualities she hoped to find in a partner.

In a 2013 interview with Page Six, she said, "I was the loneliest woman in the world, and someone said, 'You should just pray for a husband,'" she said. "I wanted a big black man from the South who looked like a football player, who already had children, who maybe had been married before . . . 3 1/2 weeks later I met my husband."

Though Davis successfully manifested her happily-ever-after, she has been transparent about the daily realities of marriage. In her episode of the OWN's "Black Love Doc," the actress noted that "one of the things that I've learned about marriage is that it's the everyday. People don't always marry the everyday. They marry the kind of now, kind of wow, then it gets to the every single day—the going to bed, the waking up, the getting the groceries, taking out the garbage and loving each other through that" (via Essence).