Hallmark Alums Alexa & Carlos PenaVega Have Some Major Red Flags In Their Marriage

We may receive a commission on purchases made from links.

Alexa PenaVega and Carlos PenaVega have been a fan-favorite couple since they started dating in 2013. The twosome, who are parents to four children, have starred alongside one another in various Hallmark and Great American Country movies and have proudly spoken about how their relationship is grounded in faith in multiple interviews. They even opened up about their lives and marriage in their own book, "What If Love Is the Point?: Living for Jesus in a Self-Consumed World." "We were just so excited about marriage and the idea of possibly sharing our testimony with others," Alexa told Fox News of why they put pen to paper. "It felt like everything out in the media depicted marriage as lame. It took the holiness out of marriage. We felt like marriage was this dying thing, and we wanted to reignite it for people and get them excited about it again," she added. 

But they have also openly admitted, like most relationships, that their marriage isn't perfect. "We have our ups and downs. Some days we are better at marriage than others, better at prioritizing and being intentional. And some days we suck at it," they wrote in the book (via Us Weekly). "Marriage can't be perfect bliss all the time. Don't let people fool you. Everyone's got crap. And it stinks," they added. And, with that candid and relatable admission in mind, there are a few major red flags in this romance that can't be ignored.

Alexa PenaVega made an interesting remark about working with her husband during a joint 2020 interview with Southern Living. "We always said, if we can, we're going to work together on every project. And if we can't then the other one will not take a project," she said. But that's not the healthiest approach to work. Both should feel they're able to chase their dreams and take on acting roles with their partner's full support and without the burden of needing to ensure they land a role too. Equally, as celebrity relationship expert Nicole Moore previously exclusively told us when pinpointing Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds' relationship red flags, if the two feel they can't work without the other by their side, that may be a problem. "It becomes a red flag when one partner doesn't trust their creative vision enough without their partner's input," she explained.

Alexa has also admitted that she prefers to work with her husband to avoid on-screen kisses with other actors. "We try our best to find projects together because, how much better that I get to work with my spouse on these movies? It just makes it so much easier," she told Christian Post. While the duo are well within their rights not to shoot intimate scenes with anyone but each other, it's important both are on the same page about the boundary. If they're turning down potentially life-changing roles because of insecurities over morals, that could lead to resentment on both sides.

Alexa PenaVega has been open about not wanting to spend too much time away from Carlos PenaVega. "This industry was not built for families. If anything, it's the opposite. You leave for six months, usually the family stays behind. And it's really hard. I don't know how you raise kids that way. I don't know how you keep a marriage strong that way," she told Southern Living, revealing both constantly travel with their kids to where the other is working. "Hallmark has just been so accommodating with that and anytime there's an opportunity for us to work together, they bring it up. And if there isn't, they fly the whole family out and we're together anyway," she said. Carlos has also confirmed his family join him when he's on tour with his band Big Time Rush, sharing on Instagram that he doesn't want to spend three months away from the most important people in his life. 

Though it's always a great idea to keep families together (especially when children are involved) and Alexa and Carlos wanting to spend as much time together as possible may sound sweet, it could be a red flag if they don't enjoy healthy time apart. "It's incredibly important for both partners to maintain a sense of independence outside of their relationship. By engaging in activities independent of each other, couples are better able to maintain their sense of self and bring diverse experiences to their relationship," Jalesa Tucker, One Love content coordinator, told Bustle. Regular, short bursts of time apart can also ensure both partners have more to discuss when they come back together and can make time spent together feel more precious. If they're together constantly, they may become co-dependent and will never have a chance to miss one another.

Prior to finding love with Carlos PenaVega, Alexa PenaVega was married to Sean Covel for just under two years. TMZ confirmed Alexa filed for divorce in July 2013 (she cited irreconcilable differences) and just four months later she met Carlos. "I think I can speak for a lot of guys when I say that we like things to move quick. Alexa was not into that though," Carlos told The War Cry of their early romance. "She wanted to be friends first ... But I was persistent," he added. 

While there's no official timeframe for getting back into dating after divorce, four months isn't a lot of time for Alexa to heal or ready herself for a new relationship. Especially considering they met at a bible study group, where she was trying to do some internal work. "I had come right out of divorce and felt that I needed to realign my life ... I wasn't looking for any kind of relationship other than the relationship I had with my faith," she told Fox News.

Things didn't move much slower when it came to tying the knot either. Carlos told Southern Living he popped the question around six to seven months after they officially stared dating. As with dating after a breakup, there's no one size fits all for how soon is too soon to get engaged. However, the pair got engaged much quicker than average U.S. couples, who a 2021 Shane Co. survey found wait an average of just over two and a half years. Couples who move too fast can easily find they aren't compatible in the long run, or could even discover they put unresolved issues from their past relationships into their new one.

Alexa PenaVega has been open about her and Carlos PenaVega having different argument styles, which can influence conflict in relationships. "I think it drives Carlos nuts, but we will argue and then I'll ask for some alone time to pray about it, or talk to God about things. Whereas Carlos is more, 'No, let's just apologize and makeup,' because he wants to end it right then and there and figure it out. I like to take time to process and think about things," she explained to The War Cry.

Alexa admitted that navigating their differing confrontation styles is not the easiest thing to do, but explained they both work hard to ensure they respect each other's needs. "We are learning every single day how to better our communication," Alexa confirmed. If they continue to keep each other's communication styles at the forefront of their minds, this may not be the dealbreaker kind of red flag. However, if in heated moments they forget, or even refuse, to consider that they react so differently, and don't take one another's needs into account (which can be easily done), it could cause major problems.

Alexa PenaVega made an eyebrow raising confession in 2023 when she and Carlos PenaVega gave a joint interview with Us Weekly. "You go through bumps. There was a time in our marriage where if we were not married, we would have broken up," she confessed. "But that's the beauty of marriage. We just fight through it. You fix it. You work on it," the "Ruby & the Rockits" star added.

While the admission proves the two are dedicated to their relationship and working together through their issues (which is a big green flag) the breakup confession leans closer to a red flag. Communicating and working together with a spouse is vital in marriage and we respect the PenaVegas for putting in the hard work to move past tough times. However, though it should never be undertaken lightly, divorce is an option for a reason and should always be on the table. Although the couple didn't elaborate on the issues that caused the tension, if a relationship is no longer serving someone or has turned toxic, no one should ever feel they have to stay just because marriage vows have been swapped.