Signs A Child Has Fear Of Love? What Is The Fear Of Love?
At the root of a child who has a fear of love, is really a fear of intimacy. Intimacy anxiety is the fear of emotional closeness with another. The child who fears love and intimacy will be reluctant to open up and be genuine for fear that they will be rejected for being their true self. They wish to avoid hurt and pain at all cost. There can be two underlying fears contributing to intimacy anxiety and they are the fear of ultimately losing the family love they already have or the fear of lack of control surrounding how love is expressed within the families love dynamic.
What Are The Signs A Child Has Fear Of Love?
1. An aversion to touch and physical affection.
Children with reactive attachment disorder often flinch, laugh, or even say “Ouch” when touched. Rather than producing positive feelings, touch and affection are perceived as a threat.
2. Control issues.
Most children with reactive attachment disorder go to great lengths to remain in control and avoid feeling helpless. They are often disobedient, defiant, and argumentative.
3. Anger problems.
Anger may be expressed directly, in tantrums or acting out, or through manipulative, passive-aggressive behavior. Children with reactive attachment disorder may hide their anger in socially acceptable actions, like giving a high five that hurts or hugging someone too hard.
4. Difficulty showing genuine care and affection.
For example, children with reactive attachment disorder may act inappropriately affectionate with strangers while displaying little or no affection towards their parents.
5. An underdeveloped conscience.
Children with reactive attachment disorder may act like they don’t have a conscience and fail to show guilt, regret, or remorse after behaving badly.
Parenting a child with love issues or insecure or reactive attachment disorder can be exhausting, frustrating, and emotionally trying.
It is hard to put your best parenting foot forward without the reassurance of a loving connection with your child. Sometimes you may wonder if your efforts are worth it, but be assured that they are. With time, patience, and concerted effort, attachment disorders can be repaired. The key is to remain calm, yet firm as you interact with your child. This will teach your child that he or she is safe and can trust you.
A child with an attachment disorder is already experiencing a great deal of stress, so it is imperative that you evaluate and manage your own stress levels before trying to help your child with theirs. Helpguide’s emotional intelligence toolkit can teach you valuable skills for managing stress and dealing with overwhelming emotions, leaving you to focus on your child’s needs.
For more information you can also read: 5 Signs A Child Has Love Issues
h/t | helpguide.org/
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