10 Reasons Why America Should Build a Wall

1. So Americans can finally get the bottom-of-the-barrel jobs they've always wanted

2. To give street artists a HUGE canvas to work with

I'm sure Trump would see all the beauty that his wall would bring.

3. Because wall-builders want to listen to the Frozen soundtrack, too

"It doesn't have to be a wall...."

4. Because we can save money by building the women's wall 22% shorter than the men's wall

To reflect the wage gap.

5. Because Americans hate making new friends

You tell 'em, Pauly D!

6. So we can finally be 100% sure that El Chupacabra won't eat our animals

Now all we have to do is worry about getting Big Foot back to Canada...

7. Because Americans know that there are plenty of other reasons for salt and lime...

And Ross can finally be okay with admitting that he's definitely not fine.

8. Because we already know how to make tacos

"Happy Cinco de Mayo! The best taco bowls are made at the Trump Tower Grill. I love Hispanics!"

9. And anyway, if it's not a wall, it can be a white picket fence since that's what America is all about

Where's Gatsby and his green light?

So Americans can finally get the bottom-of-the-barrel jobs they've always wanted

Let's make America great again.

To give street artists a HUGE canvas to work with

Because wall-builders want to listen to the Frozen soundtrack, too

Because we can save money by building the women's wall 22% shorter than the men's wall

Because Americans hate making new friends

So we can finally be 100% sure that El Chupacabra won't eat our animals

Because Americans know that there are plenty of other reasons for salt and lime...

Because we already know how to make tacos

And anyway, if it's not a wall, it can be a white picket fence since that's what America is all about

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