What To Do If You Can’t Afford Your Friend’s Bachelorette Party

90s, boy meets world
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It doesn't make you a bad friend.

I don’t think I’m the only one who thinks that bachelorette parties have gotten a little out of hand. In addition to buying a wedding gift, going to the wedding, probably going to an engagement party, you’re not just expected to attend a bachelorette party anymore— some people want you to throw down hundreds of dollars to go on a weekend away with a bunch of women you hardly know to participate in a gauntlet of forced-fun activities you can’t afford. When did it get like this? How have these parties gotten so out of hand?

It can feel like every free summer weekend is taken up by a wedding or a bachelorette party. But there my be some cases where you just run out of cash– I mean, how is anyone supposed to afford all of it? So if you’re finding the expenses just too much, don’t worry. You are definitely not alone in that. And if you really can’t afford something then I’ll tell you a little secret: you don’t have to do it. Really. It doesn’t make you a bad friend.

HEre’s what you should do if you can’t afford the bachelorette:

1. Be Honest

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Look, if you don't have the cash then you just don't have it. No good friend would want you to feel awful or get yourself into debt for something that is really outside your financial ability. So if the bride decides to get annoyed about it, that's on her. You do not need to feel guilty for not being able to afford to go— especially if it's an expensive weekend or expensive activities.

2. See If There Are Events You Can Attend

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Sometimes, you can do a bit of a mix and match. Talk to the bride or whoever is organizing the bachelorette and see if there are parts of it that are doable. Maybe you don't go for the overnight or miss the spa, but there are still drinks or a dinner that you can do. A good friend will try to make it work so you can be there for the bits that aren't too expensive.

3. Find A Way To Make It Up To Them

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Look, maybe it's just not going to happen— you can't afford it and there's no way to attend for just a part of the weekend. That's fine. Instead, try to find a way you can make it up to the bride. Ask if there's anything you can do to help for the wedding or if you can just take her out for a nice dinner or drinks. Unless the bride is a total nightmare, it's the thought that counts more than shelling out a lot of money.


No good friend would want you so stressed about money— and they certainly wouldn't blame you for not being able to afford something. With the costs of weddings going up and up and more and more parties seeming to happen around them, it's just not always an option to attend everything that you'd like to. Don't feel bad. Instead, be honest with the bride and see if there's another arrangement that the two of you can come to. If you can show her how much you care, then that should really be enough.

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