Being married is work. That's not to say that it's not incredible, rewarding, exciting, and valuable. But it's work. Just like any relationship. You're going to go through times where it feels like the easiest, happiest thing in the world. But you're also going to go through times where you look at the other person and feel like you hardly recognize them. And that's okay— because that's when the work comes in.
Because if you think of a marriage as a partnership, then you remember that there are going to be times when one partner feels stronger than the other. When one needs more. When one's struggling. When you just disagree. But when you're finding your partner challenging or the relationship needs more tending, just remember all of the times when you've been the one in need. The difficult one. The one causing problems. It's a back-and-forth.
So make sure that you do the relationship upkeep that your marriage needs. Check in with each other. Be kind to each other. And don't assume you know what the other is thinking. By keeping an eye on your relationship and making sure that you're tending to it every single day, you'll be in a much stronger position when life happens. And life will happen.
Luckily, so many people have been through this before— so there's a huge pot of wisdom to draw from. These quotes about marriage will be helpful reminders of what you love about being married and why you committed in the first place. Just keep trying.
"Don't ever stop dating your wife and don't ever stop flirting with your husband."
"Love your spouse more than you love your career, hobbies, and money. That other stuff can't love you back."
"A good marriage isn't something you find, it's something you make. And you have to keep on making it."
"The grass isn't greener on the other side. It's green where you water it."
"When word run dry, he does not try, nor do I.
We are on par.
He just is, I just am and we just are."
"In every disagreement in marriage, remember one important truth: My spouse in my partner; NOT my enemy. We will either win together or we will lose together."
"A happy marriage is about three things: memories of togetherness, forgiveness of mistakes, and a promise to never give up on each other."
"Make it your goal to create a marriage that feels like the safest space on earth."
"Always strive to give your spouse the very best of yourself; not what's left over after you have given your best to everyone else."
"All relationships have one law. Never make the one you love feel alone, especially when you're there."
"You are my today and all of my tomorrows."
"When the roots are deep there is no reason to fear the wind."
"I want to hold your hand at 80 and say, 'We made it.'"
"Great marriages don't happen by luck or by accident. They are the result of a consistent investment of time, thoughtfulness, forgiveness, affections, prayer, mutual respect, and a rock-solid commitment between a husband and wife."
"Happiness is being married to your best friend."
"Sometimes two people have to fall apart to realize how much they need to fall back together."
"I vow to still grab your hand even when we're old and wrinkly."
For every tough time in a marriage, there's a rewarding one. There are the times when you it lights up your life and makes everything seem brighter. Perhaps more importantly, there are the times when it can drag you out of a dark place and get you through the toughest of times. So it's not ever anything that should be taken for granted.
When you fight, fight well. When you disagree, do it in a healthy way. And when you're feeling distant from each other, make that commitment to reconnect and reestablish what's important to both of you— what you both love about the marriage. Because it's there.
So if marriage is work, it's also one of the best jobs in the world. Because the benefits are so much more than the cost. And everything that you put into it, you get back in exponentially more rewards. It's hard to remember when you're looking for the lost TV remote for the millionth time or can't agree on who has to take out the garbage. But do your best move beyond the mundane stuff. The petty fights. Focus on the big picture— about what the marriage means to you and why you're willing to try so hard to keep it going. And then, just keep putting in the work. Because it's worth it.
Maybe your marriage is going through a rough patch. Or maybe you know someone else who is struggling. SHARE this story with them and help them keep on making it work.