13 Hilarious Thoughts All Women Have In The Dressing Room
Where the eff is my number tag!?
Going clothes shopping can be at best, frustrating and, at worst, downright traumatic. Those little changing rooms with the horrible flimsy doors or weird curtains that don’t close— those changing room have seen some things. Seriously. Whether you’re a power shopper who can go for hours all on your own or someone who makes it a social occasion and shops with a pack of friends, the dressing room is where it gets real.
Because it never seems to go smoothly. That plain tank you found actually has a horrible slogan on it, the brand you always buy has changed its sizing, or you just can’t find a pair of jeans that looks right. Don’t worry— it’s happened to the best of us. So things can get pretty ridiculous in there, because the truth is none of us look our best— or act our best— in a tiny room surrounded by fluorescent lights.
From wrestling with a pile of clothes, keeping track of everything you want to buy, and feeling like you have to hang on to your little number ticket with every ounce of strength that you have, it’s a ridiculous experience. So here are thing that all women have been through in a changing room, because it is not easy.
1. These Clothes Are Tangling On Purpose To Make Me Angry
I brought them in and they suddenly turned into a knot. WTF.
2. How Can I Try These On With The Least Amount Of Effort
One pair of jeans, then all the tops? One sweater, then all the jeans? Let's make this easy, people.
3. Do I Need To Take My Shoes Off?
I can try on jeans without taking off my combat boots, right?
4. I Look Like The Tiredest Zombie In The World
The lighting is NOT forgiving.
5. This Is My Color!
I totally will look amazing in highlighter yellow, right?!
6. Nope, I Was Wrong
So. Very. Wrong.
7. I Need A System
Yes? No? Maybe? Whoooooooops they're all in a pile on the floor.
8. I Am 45 Different Sizes
Wait, so why am I an XS in this top but an XXL in these pants? What is happening? Am I Alice In Wonderland!?
9. I Will Totally Wear This Mesh Crop Top
Nope, you won't.
10. Why Aren't All Jeans Just Exactly Like My Old Jeans... But New
It's like shopping for the freaking holy grail.
11. OH MY GOD I'VE LOST THE TICKET
What happens if you don't have your number? Do they send you to store prison? Do you just die there?
12. I Should Pretend I'm Taking All Of These
You don't want to admit you don't like anything, so you pretend to take everything and then just ditch it somewhere.
13. I'll Just Shop Online
Which is what you really should have done in the first place, right?
Shopping for clothes is stressful and ridiculous for a lot of us— so if you have an existential crisis every time you enter a dressing room, you are not alone. Just try to laugh it off, because none of us are looking our best under those florescent lights.
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