Get Real: 14 Serious Signs That He May Be Cheating
We all know the telltale signs: the lingering scent of perfume on his collar, the sudden surge in late night work hours, the way he bolts for the shower the second he gets home. But what are some of the more subtle signs your guy may be seeing someone else?
1. His Tastes or Opinions Suddenly Change
The longer you’ve been with a man, the easier this clue becomes to detect. Notice him suddenly using new phrases or words a lot that he never has before? A sudden shift in musical taste or opinions on current events? These can be subtle signs that’s he’s picking up habits or interests from someone else.
2. He Suddenly Has New Bedroom Moves
A less subtle version of the above, any time your guy suddenly starts busting out new moves in the bedroom that you didn’t learn together, you may have a big red flag on your hands. Unless you come across a karma sutra book he’s been reading in the bathroom, it’s not unreasonable to assume he may be learning them from another lover.
3. He Wakes Up Startled or Confused
This could be an indication that’s he’s become used to sleeping in more than one bed and needs a minute upon awakening to figure out where exactly he is. This kind of confusion can also spill into his behavior when he's trying to recall details of things you did together. If it sometimes takes him a minute to remember whether you've been to a certain restaurant or seen a certain movie together, it may be because he's trying to figure out if that's you or someone else across from him in a particular memory.
4. Becomes Easily Offended When You Make Innocent Inquiries
Has your guy ever snapped at you for not respecting his privacy, even when all you asked about was how his day went? The more defensive he becomes about telling you where he’s been or who he was with, the worse his odds of innocence may be. This is especially true if he responds this way when you are sincerely just trying to make conversation and aren't even being accusatory.
5. He Starts Closing Doors He Usually Doesn't
Though a subtle sign, if your guy starts closing bathroom or bedroom doors that he generally wouldn’t have before, it may be a sign that he’s looking to create barriers between the two of you. If he ends up behind said closed door for a prolonged length of time with his phone, then the odds are even greater than he may be slipping away to do his evil, cheater deeds.
6. He Suddenly Becomes More Interested In His Appearance
While having a guy that takes pride in his abs can be a lovely thing for sure, you may be in rocky terrain if his sudden interest in himself coincides with a decrease in interest in you and/or sex. While there's no need to panic if your guy joins a gym, especially if he doesn't mind you tagging along every now and then, constant trips to work-out that start to replace time usually spent with you may be a red flag. This coupled with his sudden interest in things like cologne or other manscaping tools may be a sign that he's making himself pretty for someone else.
7. He Stops Inviting You To Business or Social Functions
If you notice that your man starts increasingly leaving you at home while he attends social or business functions that you'd have been welcome to accompany him to in the past, it could be another sign that he's meeting up with someone else. Whether you notice his attendance suddenly spike at “guy’s only” outings or he starts insisting on going to work functions solo, this may be a sign that things aren’t as innocent as he claims.
8. His Other Bad Habits Suddenly Spike
No one likes a cheater, ironically not even cheaters themselves. If your guy has been doing you wrong behind your back then the odds are that his guilt will start seeping into your relationship in one form of another. This may include an increase in self-destructive habits such as drinking, smoking, or gambling that allow him an escape from the reality of what a dirtbag he’s being. Or it may come across in a sudden increase in the amount of arguing the two of you do. By picking fights with you and attempting to bring out your worse, he may be subconsciously looking for reasons to validate his bad behavior.
9. He Suddenly Starts Buying You a Ton of Gifts
A slightly more pleasant form that guilt can take, especially if you refuse to fall into the bickering trap, is that of him suddenly becoming freakishly nice. If your husband's the kind of guy that couldn’t remember your birthday if it was tattooed on his forehead, but suddenly starts buying you all kinds of sparkly things just "because," then it may be time for a reality check
10. He Suddenly Gets Super Protective of His Phone
If you've ever picked up your guy’s phone to check the time, only to have him flip out and yank away from you, then ding, ding, ding, you’ve got a winner on your hands, cupcake. If you guys have been together for a significant amount of time or are married, this shouldn’t be something he so much as bats an eye over.
11. His Phone Starts “Dying”…. A Lot
If you suddenly notice that your man's become a lot harder to get a hold of, it may be because he’s trying to hide your texts and calls from his lover while they are out together. If you don’t know about her, then chances are that she either doesn’t know about you or is being constantly reassured that he’s going to “leave you” any moment now. In either case, communicating with you while he's with her is probably something he's careful to avoid.
12. Women’s Intuition
Though it’s difficult to explain in words, every woman in the world knows what we mean by this one. Even when he’s there with you, he just never feels “present.” He always seems lost in his own thoughts, stops noticing you, or stops showing interest in the things you used to love to do together. Whatever form it takes, if something just feels “off” to you, then it usually is whether cheating turns out to be the culprit or not.
13. Friends' Intuition
Unfortunately, when you love someone you can look past a staggering amount of evidence to keep yourself from having to face the horrible truth. If you’re lucky enough to have friends who start to ask questions about the possibility of something being off in your relationship, don’t be so quick to tell them to mind their own business. One of the amazing, though occasionally painful, benefits of a true friend is their ability to catch things that you may not.
14. He Gets Defensive Rather Than Hurt When Confronted
Any man who is genuinely concerned about making a relationship work should be more concerned than angry by the idea that his girl suspects him of stepping out. Whereas a guy interested in your future together should be open to discussing any genuine inquiry you have into what may have changed between the two of you, a guy who immediately flies into defense mode is much more likely to have something to hide. Defensiveness and counter-accusations of jealousy or overbearingness are a cheater's best friend. Don't fall into the trap of allowing them to make you feel bad enough to ignore your instincts.
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