15 Frightful Elvira Quotes to Read During Spooky Season

Elvira surrounded by townspeople in 'Elvira: Mistress of the Dark'
Elvira: Mistress of the Dark via New World Pictures

A true Halloween queen!

Feel Like a Mistress of the Dark by Reading These Elvira Quotes

When it comes to iconic female horror characters, one of the first ones that comes to mind is likely Elvira.

With her jet black hair and plunging gown, the Mistress of the Dark is hard to ignore. She's stolen the hearts of many, mostly by force, and keeps many of them in jars next to her coffin-shaped bed. We're only slightly kidding about that.

Anyway, she's a goddess we often try to emulate during spooky season. You can do that, too, by reading through these frighteningly delightful Elvira quotes now!

Best Elvira Quotes

  • "Be yourself, no matter what people say. For if you were a perfect person, you would still be judged by people."

  • "Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most drop dead gorgeous one of all?"

  • "And if they ever ask about me, tell them I was more than just a great set of boobs. I was also an incredible pair of legs. And tell them... tell them that I never turned down a friend. I... never turned down a stranger for that matter. And tell them... tell them that when all is said and done, I only ask that people remember me by two simple words. Any two, as long as they're simple."

  • "Yeah, but now all I can make it do is look cheap."

  • "I didn't know I had a good aunt, let alone a great one."

Funny Elvira Quotes

  • "Revenge is better than Christmas."

  • "My name's Elvira, but you can call me tonight."

  • "My appearance is kind of a shock to everybody."

  • "I haven't had any complaints yet."

  • "Well, it is a pot luck. And believe me, when they open that pot they're gonna need all the luck they can get."

Sultry Elvira Quotes

  • "Oh well, there's nothing wrong with G-rated movies, as long as there's lots of sex and violence."

  • "Just grab a tool and start banging."

  • "No, but if you hum a few bars I'll fake it."

  • "I'd bend over backwards. I'd bend over forwards."

  • "Yeah, go ahead and fire me. I need this job like a leper needs a three-way mirror! It just so happens, I have an act opening up in Las Vegas!"

We Want to Hear From You

Which Elvira quote made you want to dye your hair black and find a black gown that shows off your cleavage?

Tweet us @womendotcom or message us on Facebook to tell us!