15 Hilarious 'Dodgeball' Movie Quotes to Laugh at Now

Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story via 20th Century Fox

"If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball."

You Won't Want to Dodge These Hysterical Dodgeball Movie Quotes

With its ridiculous premise and stellar cast, Dodgeball quickly became a comedy cult classic.

There's not a single person who hasn't seen the film a handful of times in their lifetime. They may not necessarily be too fond of it, but they can't deny they didn't laugh more than they should've at all the inappropriate jokes sprinkled throughout the film.

We're here to remind you just how hysterical the movie is with these Dodgeball movie quotes. Read through them now!

Best Dodgeball Quotes

  • "You're adopted, you're parents don't even love you." -Peter

  • "Because I think you're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." -Owen

  • "Sorry, I just threw up in my mouth a little bit." -Kate

  • "You're about as useful as a poopy-flavored lollipop." -Patches

  • "Nobody makes me bleed my own blood. Nobody!" -White

Funny Dodgeball Quotes

  • "Oh, I don't think I'm a lot dumber than you think that I thought that I thought I was once." -White

  • "Well, I guess if a person never quit when the going got tough, they wouldn't have anything to regret for the rest of their life. But good luck to you Peter. I'm sure this decision won't haunt you forever." -Lance

  • "I drink my own urine cause it's sterile and it tastes good." -Patches

  • "I think most politicians could take a dodgeball in the face." -White

  • "Alright Kate, time to put your mouth where our balls are." -Peter

Iconic Dodgeball Quotes

  • "I found that if you have a goal, that you might not reach it. But if you don't have one, then you are never disappointed. And I gotta tell ya, it feels phenomenal." -Peter

  • "If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball." -Patches

  • "Because at Globo Gym, we're better than you! And we know it!" -White

  • "Remember the five D's of dodgeball: Dodge, Dip, Duck, Dive, and uh...Dodge!" -Patches

  • "Thank you, Chuck Norris." -Peter

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Which quote from the movie made you do a spit take?

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