Not The Only One? How To Survive Being Cheated On
Should you stay or leave?
Cheating often destroys relationships, but it doesn’t have to destroy you personally. Overcoming infidelity and moving on is possible in time with the right frame of mind and support system.
Whether you decide to stay or leave depends on a myriad of factors, so it’s important to ask yourself the following questions:
1. Was this a one-time indiscretion, or has it been an on-going occurrence?
If your partner has been having a long-term affair or has been cheating with multiple partners for some time, that is usually a sign that deeper issues with your partner’s personality are at play. If your partner really only messed up one time, there might still be hope that it never will happen again.
2. Are you married and / or do you have children together?
Things like marriage and children obviously complicate things. Sometimes a couple may decide to stay together for the kids or to work on their relationship rather than get an impending divorce. But even if you are married or have children, you are in no way under any obligation to stay.
3. Did your partner confess before getting caught?
If your partner confessed to you out of guilt rather than waiting until caught, chances are the remorse is genuine. Furthermore, someone who is willing to accept responsibility for cheating and to work on regaining your trust is much more redeemable than someone who is deceptive or unwilling to admit any wrongdoing.
If you do decide to stay, couples’ therapy with a professional is probably the best way to help you and your partner build trust and love again over time.
If you decide to leave, it’s important to go through the five stages of grief:
Giving yourself the time to grieve properly will allow you to move on and be your happy, healthy self again.
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