Don't You Want Me: Clinton and Trump Really Wanted You To See Them

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Clinton and Trump take it to the stage

The Short of It:

Last night the two presidential candidates put themselves on display in their first big debate of the 2016 election race. By the end, it was pretty clear that Clinton, who poked and prodded the thin-skinned bear that is Donald Trump, had won the debate. At the end of the night, it became clear that Trump had come unprepared, had no newly picked topics or insights to share, became more and more easily goaded by the grinning Clinton, and oh yeah, had a cold. Call Grey's Anatomy folks, we've got a new patient in the house and the world would like to call him "McSniffles".

The Longer Version of It:

Hofstra University hosted GOP nominee Donald Trump and Democratic nominee Hillary Clinton last night in the first presidential debate of the season. Lester Holt was there too as the moderator, but he fell sleep somewhere at the debates beginning so we won't count him in on this one.

Here's what they talked about...

The Candidates

As Trump scowled and sniffed while delving out blows, Clinton delivered as many blows as she could with a grin. Clinton demanded an apology from Trump to the thousands of workers whom so she says he has insulted and cheated over the years. Trump wanted everyone to know that Clinton could have made changes in politics in the "30 years" that she's been an active politico and that his "temperament" was "much better," faster and stronger than Clinton's.

The Economy

While Clinton focused her attention on a need to raise the minimum wage and turn heads towards the gender pay gap, Trump asserted that the US was bleeding jobs which China and Mexico were picking up and taking.

Trade

Here's where the internet broke, when people rushed to Google to look up "TPP" akaThe Trans-Pacific Partnership. This was the part in the debate that Trump condemned Clinton for her initial support in President Obama's new trade deal. Clinton said 'WRONG use my fact checker, and go ahead and buy my book at the airport if you can't get it right'.

Tax Returns

You might have missed this, but Trump has yet to reveal his. Lester took a moment to remind Trump of this and was met with Trump's response that he would. That is, as soon as he finishes being audited by the IRS him. Clinton also took a moment to remind people that Trump's "really big" tax plan would cost the US millions of the jobs Trump says we're losing to Mexico.

Racial Tensions

Turns out, Trump thinks stop-and-frisk policies are the best way to go and thinks high-crime cities like Chicago should revisit them as a proper strategy. Here's where Holt woke up from a snooze to point out that NYC had ruled stop-and-frisk as unconstitutional ages ago. Here's where all of the mansplaining in the world happened and Trump told Holt 'not true'. Clinton then reminded the audience that she wants to work on getting police departments and black communities to work together.

President Obama

If you haven't heard about Trump's Obama birther conspiracy, know that Trump for the past 8 years has said Obama actually isn't a US citizen up until last week. Holt questioned Trump about this, and Trump said Clinton's campaign was the one to start in '08. Fact check: Wrong.

Cyber Security

Trump is really impressed that his son Barron Trump works so well on a computer and Clinton still has her feathers ruffled over the fact that Trump called on Russia to hack her emails.

ISIS

Trump didn't reveal his plan but thinks Clinton is being reckless by showing her cards and showing her ISIS attack strategy on her website.

The Takeaway:

In the world of social media and excellent real time fact checkers and oh yeah, super creative meme generators, Trump has yet to realize that lies will always get hung.